This is a bit of a strange random post today. I just feel like i need to get it off my chest and tell someone...the internet counts as a person right?!
So I have worked in retail since I left college, where i dreamed of becoming a fashion illustrator. At the same time as going to college I worked part time in several brands, nothing exciting!
I enjoyed college but I had had enough of studying and my head was else where, I don't want to live my life saying I regret this or that but I wish I could have motivated myself to push into the career I dreamed of. My weakest quality is probably motivation/procrastination.
So i got on with college finished with a passing grade and decided it wasn't for me so worked full time, I also decided to move out and live with my boyfriend and 4 friends. So needed the money of a full time job.
Watching all my friends going off to uni and living student life i decided to give college another go and did a foundation degree, again I just don't think my head was in it and I passed but I really could have excelled. So after the year of working and college I decided i would work i kind of fell into being trained to be a team leader and had to do a lot of courses and training and i loved every minute of it. I stuck it out for a couple of years and started to train as an assistant manager. I worked so hard and because i loved it I really got my head down and worked.
Me and my boyfriend had also now brought our own house (we were 21, something I am really proud of doing so young!). At this point in time my then manager turned evil...she hated me and made my life hell, which is when I started to dislike my job and re-think what i wanted to do.
I changed units within the same company a couple of times due to the manager and ended up managing my own unit, which I loved. Then a bate of redundancies kind of put me off track, I wasn't made redundant but the worry and stress and then having to move units when I didn't want to just put it in my head this is NOT what I want to do in life!!!!
So I ended up getting a pay rise and being promoted but I just wasn't happy. Work drama/being bullied by a member of senior management and suffering with panic attacks and depression that was so bad I found it hard to leave the house made me realize if you are not happy in your job your whole life will be effected. I even thought the only way out of this is to get pregnant...which is ridiculous!
So after being off work for almost 2 months with stress and anxiety I went back but my head was not in it, this was a week ago and I have handed in my resignation and demoting myself to a team leader, back to where I was 3 years ago. I wanted to focus my career on something I have always loved but didn't really realize you could have a career in it and its MAKE UP! I want to be a make-up artist, and want to have a successful beauty blog!
So here I am 24 and having a career change, Only time will tell what this will bring but I want to be happy and I know now money will not make you happy. I would rather be working a minimum paid job doing something I am passionate about than getting bonus' and being miserable.
So here I am starting over in life...Scary!
Rach x
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